Ind e-Pen XXVI

The Ind e-Pen

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Introduction

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Eh-o. Half the year is gone. You know what that means: I’m a pessimist. Yup. I didn’t say, “We still have half of the year left,” or “the year is half-full.” Damn. Well, that’s fine with me. I won’t be classified by your petty stereotypes. I say what I want to say. 180 days have faded into oblivion and I’m happy, damn it!

Groups.

In order to celebrate this half-way point, I have decided to make the IeP into a Yahoo! Group (which seems like I’m demoting it, but really I’m just abusing Yahoo’s free service for my own benefit). This thinly veiled laziness comes with the addition of yet another e-mail address to the list, which makes me that much more afraid that I’ll be called SPAM by the Cyber Cops.

However, in order to become a real group, I had to classify the IndePen under the MAN’S categories. Check them out. Guess which one I picked:

Business & Finance

Computers & Internet

Cultures & Community

Entertainment & Arts

Family & Home

Games

Government & Politics

Health & Wellness

Hobbies & Crafts

Music

Recreation & Sports

Regional

Religion & Beliefs

Romance & Relationships

Schools & Education

Science

The obvious choice would be “Entertainment & Arts,” seeing as I send out all of my best artwork through this medium =(^-^)= But would I really choose the obvious choice? Obviously not.

Next, you might imagine that I would go for something totally off the wall like “Religion & Beliefs,” “Romance & Relationships,” or “Government & Politics.” But then they make you choose from these hideously long subcategories and I rapidly lost my patience. So what then, do you ask, did I choose?

Well, I figured that if I hated long categories, so did everyone else (this is the same logic that led to my dressing up as Santa Claus during high school). Therefore, if I could only find the shortest series of categories, everyone would be happy and we’d all learn to adjust.

Thus, hopefully next week a Yahoo Group will send out this e-mail under the “Games > Other” category. Which basically means that now we have to start doing game reviews like “Hopscotch: Too gay or not gay enough?” and “Is your son summoning evil spirits while he sleeps??” I think it’ll be a nice change, don’t you?

Actually, come to think of it. I dressed up as Santa Claus twice.

Freelancing

Last week, I inteviewed for a luxurious position at a major metropolitain newspaper. I didn’t get the job, but I didn’t really expect to. I mean, I had just found out what a Graphic Designer WAS the day before the interview. Really, it was just a hyped up excuse to give a high ranking geek (and he was a geek) a Pix Capacitor.

Interestingly, though, this led me down a train of thought that had stops in Brokesville, Concernland, and Panic City. How am I surviving? I mean honestly. I have no job, no regular income, I actually Lose money from my side business. There has got to be a way for me to cash in on my abilities (you know, the ability to stick to walls and make asinine comments to evil doers before a major battle scene).

This was when a friend of mine suggested that I do some Freelance work. It seemed like a great idea. I mean, Spiderman did it right? And just look at how He was rolling in cash. By the way, Spiderman is full of it.

Anyone that’s ever tried developing pictures or sewing a Spiderman costume knows that there is No way Anybody could do everything he does and still maintain a good GPA, make his webshooters, and catch criminals! Grr… It’s so irritating … So yeah, I’m going to see Spiderman 2 on opening day.

Anyway, it turns out that doing Freelance anything is a full-time job. I spent a few hours yesterday looking up places that accepted unsolicited articles or stories. Apart from most of them being topic specific (which means that I have to actually write something), they were ridiculously competitive (which means that if I were rejected, and I probably would be, I would have an article ready for publication in Nothing Else at All), and paid ungodly tiny amounts of money (like $5 for 2000 words. Honestly).

Now, a lot of you are probably like, “Hey, a chance at having something un-worthwhile and tiny is better than no chance at all.” Well, all I have to say is, Do you talk to your wife like that?

No, I’d rather go with my previous plan of selling out, I mean taking corporate America’s money. Come September, when my website and 5 year collection of viewspapers comes out, I’ll begin courting businesses (“Marry me Hastings!”) for donations and advertisements. But in the mean time… do you need any freelance work?

A Small Quiz:

Congratulations to Nikki Soohy, who won last week’s quiz with her simple, yet entertaining answers. Good job. She’ll get another Pix Capacitor around July 10.

Last Week’s Questions:

1: Should I keep using three questions, or come up with a new device?

2: Does this question work best second, or should I switch it around?

3: Is that Mustard gas that I inhaled going to hurt me or just give me super powers?

Her Answers:

1: Yes

2: No

3: Yes

This Week’s Questions:

1: Will being classified as another type of game affect this e-mail?

2: Do you think that I really Did dress up as Santa Claus twice? Possibly once the last day of the Fall semester my Freshman year and once for Horror Day during our school’s Spirit Week?

3: Will You pay me for a Free lance job?

Bonus: Does this question work best second, or should I switch it around?

To be removed from this list, write to Gabe’s cousin, Dave G. Beaver.

The Ind e-Pen +++vol+1+++BT+26+++ Introduction ============== Eh-o. Half the year is gone. You know what that means: I’m a pessimist. Yup. I didn’t say, “We still have half of the year left,” or “the year is half-full.” Damn. Well, that’s fine with me. I won’t be classified by your petty stereotypes. I say what I…

2 Comments

  1. Ehh, forget the first 3 questions… I don’t really care about them. It’s the bonus that has me puzzled… How the hell do you answer a question that does not make sense?

  2. Carlos,

    I can only come up with one reason that Nikki Soohy is winning more pix’s than anyone. She must be sleeping with you. If this is not the case then at least she must be sending you naked pix…..er….pics of herself. Either way you win!

    Here is some artwork for you: \o/

    and my quiz answers……

    1: I have no idea what this questions means so I’ll go with no.

    2: I bet you used that suit to sneak across the Mexican border and into the States.

    3: No, absolutely not.