10 Things all of my friends should be willing to do

Barring mitigating circumstances, all of my friends should be willing to:

  1. Bail me out of jail if need be (I’ve seriously lost a friend because of this)
  2. Give me a relatively small amount of change (such as to be able to afford a coffee) and not expect to be paid back.
  3. Be willing to loan me up to the cost of a meal.
  4. Tell me if I look ridiculous, as long as it’s something I have the power to change before I go out in public.
  5. Help me move no more than once per year.
  6. Offer me food/drink when I’m visiting… and not remember it for later arguments.
  7. Let me use her phone for a short amount of time.
  8. Pick up items or run errands for me if they are urgent or relatively easy to perform.  Also, if it would be far harder for me to do them than if she simply did them for me.
  9. Give me a ride to work, home, or to run errands if it is urgent or not a major hassle.
  10. Let me sleep on their floor/couch if I’m traveling or homeless.

The last one is particularly important for me as I’m often homeless and/or traveling.  But I suppose that’s how you find out who your tru friends are.

About Pixel

Pixel Q. Styx refuses to talk about himself. If thou wishest, thou may infer from his blog what thou wishest.

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6 Responses to 10 Things all of my friends should be willing to do

  1. courtney says:

    are those ten things really an issue? i mean, have you had problems with them in the past? because seriously, that all seems like common sense friend stuff.

  2. Pixel says:

    I know, I thought so too, but I’ve had problems with three of those. Maybe I should work on my definition of the word friend.

  3. Charles says:

    One thing you should be willing to do for all your friends:
    Allow your friends the latitude to refuse a guilted demand to accomidate an under-thought-out action of whim without fear of a figurative, retaliatory, passive-agressive slap to the face.

  4. Becca says:

    And meanwhile, three tru friends are holed up in one room — one very overpriced but lovely room that passes as an apartment in Seattle — and not being very passive-aggressive (two “g”s, I’m paid to do this) about how we are going bonkers when there’s not much room for retreat.

    Basically, what I’m saying is that I’m doing my best to be accommodating (two “m”s) lest a friend have to sleep in his car in the middle of a Northwest winter or shell out an assload of money for a hotel room in this godforsaken money-sucking town. Action of whim or not, that’s just fucked (extremely contagious diseases excepting).

    Sorry if this comment is not worthy of deciphering. It’s been a long fucking week and I don’t have the luxury of a bedroom to retreat to.

  5. Charles says:

    While I appreciate your frustration, (I’ve had my fair share of “Guy-On-The-Couch Syndrome”) I do not think it is fair to require me to take on a burden for which I had no say. If my unwillingness to be as accommodating (2 “m”s I’m told) as you are makes me a bad friend, (or acquaintance I feel is more accurate) then I guess I am and for that I apologize; however, mindfully and unnecessarily putting friends (or acquaintances) in situations such as the one you are currently enduring, when with a bit of planning, foresight and consideration for others said situation could have easily been avoided, is, in my opinion, the action of a bad friend (or acquaintance).

    Peace and Love,
    Charles

    PS-Thanks for the condescending copy editing. The check’s in the mail.

  6. Frank J says:

    I helped you with all of these things, last week, and I’m still not your friend.

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