Things I wish I could say to people, but can’t (pt. IV of XXVI)

I’m going to start linking to all of them soon.  Next time, probably.

• You were funner when your life was terrible.
• You’re loud and overbearing.  That said, I somehow have the desire to hang out with you.  Weird.
• Sorry to hear about all of your misfortune.  I’d say you don’t deserve it, but there’s an off chance that you might.
• Sorry I stayed at your house and left the next day like it was a bad motel rather than a timely favor.
• You are a jerk that stayed at my house and left the next day like it was a bad motel.  This is unforgivable.  You are a jerk.  (Hm.  It really is strange that you two are next to each other on the phone book.)
• So, you’re coming here next semester.  So it goes.
• Nice knowing you.  I much preferred you to the friend that introduced us.  Oh, well.  Have a nice life.
• Sorry about your father.  He seemed like a nice man.
• Ring… ring… ring…  Why doesn’t anyone ever answer here?
• Happy graduation.  Have an awesome life.
• Remember that time you plagiarized off me?  Yeah, that wasn’t cool, man.  You made me look bad.
• You were hot.  Interesting?  Weeeell…… …. … .. .
• You scare me.
• I had a crush on your sister.  Why did you both end up so crazy??

… so it goes.

Update:  pt. i, pt. ii, pt. iii, pt. iv, pt. v, pt. vi, pt. vii, pt. viii, pt. ix, pt. x, pt. xi, pt. xii, pt. xiii, pt. xiv, pt. xv, pt. xvi, pt. xvii, pt. xviii, pt. xix, pt. xx, pt. xxi, pt. xxii, pt. xxiii, pt. xxiv, pt. xxv, pt. xxvi (most of these links won’t work until I actually publish the rest of the series.  That said.  Use these to navigate what you can until then.)

I’m going to start linking to all of them soon.  Next time, probably. You were funner when your life was terrible. You’re loud and overbearing.  That said, I somehow have the desire to hang out with you.  Weird. Sorry to hear about all of your misfortune.  I’d say you don’t deserve it, but there’s an…