Author Archives: Gabe the Beaver

Tao of Gabe: On Mass Girls

Jayna, To prepare for this article, I lived with twenty-six girls for a period of six months. I just don’t mention them in the article because I barely made it up right now. Love, Gabe. ~o_O~ Gabe the Ketotic Beaver … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: On Ninja Speak, Arguments

Jayna, I’m probably going to take a week off soon. This is killing me. And Pix’s criticisms aren’t helping. -Gabe ~~~ Tao of Gabe Gabe the Jingoistic Beaver here with another lesson in ‘Ninja Speak.’ Ninja Speak is an elusive … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: On Writing the Tao of Gabe

Jayna, This how to guide got me through writing this how to guide. Love, Gabe Tao of Gabe Gabe the Iconoclastic Beaver here with a lesson in humor writing. You might well have incorrectly gathered that writing humor is simple … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: Welcome Back

Dear Fans, Gabe the Hysterical Beaver here welcoming you back to another warm and joyous semester of beaver-related hijinks. I’m your local newspaper’s humor columnist. As a 3’ 1” beaver with a bitch for a wife, a fox for a … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: On Finals Dreaming…

Gabe the Gorgeous Beaver is finally done with his final exams. And now all I have to do is wait for the results that will tell me whether my beaver papillomavirus (BPV) is still malignant. Failed pick-up lines: “Quick! Let’s … Continue reading

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