Atlas Shrugged


How I make a thoughtful post in six short steps:

  1. As I was writing the previous post, I noticed how all of my posts seem to have the same basic formula.  First, there is the background (“As I was writing. . .”), where I explain what led to the thought I’m about to impart.  Sometimes, nothing at all leads to my thoughts, so I lie.  You’ll thank me for it later.
  2. While I write the background, I take special care to be short and clear, but I won’t stop from being irreverent, assenine, non-sequitur or anything else that fits neatly into the realm of humor but can only be described of as funny by kids who still think knock-knock jokes are clever.
  3. Then in my thoughtful posts (most of which are labeled ‘thought experiment’ or ‘slice of life’) I lay out the situation and a thought about it.  In this case, the situation is my constant formula-following posts, which is a real problem, as it means that I can only think of one way to explain my mind to people. In my posts that derive from real life experiences, I go on to explain the situation that led to the thought.
  4. The situation inevitably leads to an irrelevant connection. You probably wouldn’t read this blog if it weren’t for the fact that I make connections not many others do (or even should).
  5. I then try (though not always succeed) at forming an original thought from the experience. Usually this is something about human interaction, though I have been known to make philosophical, sociological and psychological claims. It all depends on what’s going on in my life at the time.
  6. Finally I try to make a conclusion to tie everything together. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I don’t. Thankfully, though, the post always ends. In this case, my conclusion is to try to write different posts (or post types) in the near future. Theoretically, a thought can be explained in as many ways as it comes to the original thinker, so why limit myself to just this tried and (mostly true) way?

I’ve not written anything silly or funny in a while, but rest assured: next time I do, I’ll sabotage it by analyzing the crap out of it like I did here.

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