Five Years

The Tale of Sordon Gpurgeon (part 3 of 4)

As promised, our story begins when Gordon and I are friends and we spend much of freshman year together… but first, a word about my first girlfriend.1

Over the summer, I developed a crush on a girl, Crystle, and asked her out. She rejected me, but I got over it. When school started up again, she developed a crush on me… one that I no longer reciprocated. Even when it was painfully obvious that I had moved on, Crystle just became more and more obsessed. She became jealous every time I spoke to another girl and randomly shouted at me for the most innocuous things.

Ordinarily, I could have just avoided her and the situation would have resolved itself, but Crystle somehow worked her way into my social circle. She worked her way into the Drama club clique and the speed-dial of all my friends. Then, instead of being on my side, suddenly my friends became angry at me for ‘leading her on’ and ‘sending mixed signals.’2

Because I was a weak-willed 14 year old, I didn’t man up and tell them all to go F themselves.3 I also didn’t tell anyone the truth: she was crazy and I was completely over her. Instead, I asked Crystle out again. And she rejected me, again.4 But a few days later, she asked if the ‘offer was still open’ (whatever that means) and we began to date.

Enter Gordon. Crystle begins to schmooze Gordon as a way to get even further involved in my life. It’s not long before she realizes they have more in common with each other than either of them do with me. In fact, Gordon begins taking her to Amtgard. That’s when I know it’s serious.

One day, Gordon calls me,

“I’m going to steal your girlfriend.”

he says.

I laugh and say it’s okay. We chuckle about it, because we both know he’s serious and we both know that so am I. Since it’s what we both want, we figure that we’ll remain friends no matter what.

I can tell this story because it’s been more than five years, and I don’t care what you think of 14 y.o. me:
Five Years

Gordon didn’t have to try very hard to get me and Crystle to break up. I handled that just fine by myself. One day, I accuse her of being jealous, controlling, and not trusting me. I forget about the conversation, but the next day she brings her diary to school and hands it to me without a word. Naturally, I have no idea what this means. Throughout the day, I go through the book looking for clues as to why she handed it to me. Instead, I realize that even her inner-most thoughts were boring.

Later that day, I find out that she handed me her diary to prove she trusted me not to look through it. (Oops.) I hang on to the diary for a day or two before I hand it back to her, locked, just like she’d left it. I don’t know what gave me away. I don’t know if it was the fact that some of the pages were ruffled, or some of her drawings of dragons were tucked into different pages, or perhaps it was my scribbling insulting notes in the margins, but Crystle realized that I had opened it and instantly broke up with me.

A few days later, she and Gordon started dating. Crystle refused to speak to me and Gordon and I grew apart as he began spending all of his free time with a girl that wanted me dead.

When they broke up, he tried to reestablish the friendship, but I had made a new circle of friends and didn’t have time for him… then, one day he moved away to Washington state and we haven’t seen each other since.

…To be concluded…
  1. *Shudder* []
  2. I still don’t know how to do that. I figure it means saying ‘I love you,’ but crossing your eyes and flailing your limbs at the same time. []
  3. Or worse: G themselves! []
  4. I KNOW!! []

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