I’ve gotten to the point where I look people up on Facebook just so that I can block them before they can find me.
I’ve gotten to the point where I look people up on Facebook just so that I can block them before they can find me.
“If you do not own a hammock, you have wasted your life.
“If you do not own a hammock, you have wasted your life.” – Mother Teresa of Calcutta
The university counseling service’s web site is so depressing.
The university counseling service’s web site is so depressing.
I liked my last status so much, I re-tweeted it.
I liked my last status so much, I re-tweeted it.
The first anesthesiologists were really just overzealous bartenders.
The first anesthesiologists were really just overzealous bartenders.
They say writers craft their ideal world.
They say writers craft their ideal world. That’s probably why all of my stories are about writers who are slightly more productive than me.
@gabethebeaver @miggriv – What do I do when my brother forwards me a political e-mail that I find inaccurate and offensive?
@gabethebeaver – What do I do when my brother forwards me a political e-mail that I find inaccurate and offensive?
Google Scholar is a search engine for academic articles.
Google Scholar is a search engine for academic articles. I think my path to getting tenure will include Google Scholar Bombing my articles.
I want to start a video project for high school bullies called “It Gets Worse.
I want to start a video project for high school bullies called “It Gets Worse… It Gets Sooo Much Worse.”
Group think
There’s an episode of How I Met Your Mother where one of the characters talks about how groups of women always look hotter than each individual woman. They called it the “Cheerleader Effect.” In high school, my group of friends…
I’d love it if “Land Before Time” made it on the list of 101 bloodiest movies: http://t.
I’d love it if “Land Before Time” made it on the list of 101 bloodiest movies: But I’m just happy Titanic beat Rambo.
It’s only eugenics if you have a goal in mind.
It’s only eugenics if you have a goal in mind.
I have the financial stability of a house of cards.
I have the financial stability of a house of cards.
Pro tip: if you want to cancel your Time Warner Cable service EVENTUALLY, you should start the process now.
Pro tip: if you want to cancel your Time Warner Cable service EVENTUALLY, you should start the process now.
When I die, you have my permission to forge my signature and use my credit cards to buy a speedboat.
When I die, you have my permission to forge my signature and use my credit cards to buy a speedboat.
Someone please explain why people joke about receiving sexy DMs.
Someone please explain why people joke about receiving sexy DMs. Preferably in a DM of some sort. 😉
The town in Psych has more murders per capita than it has capita.
The town in Psych has more murders per capita than it has capita.
I derive endless amusement from the word “sexting.
I derive endless amusement from the word “sexting.” From actual sexting, though, my amusement usually peaks after four or five minutes.