Yeah, well that's generally what these feel like.

Things I wish I could conclude about my psyche, but can’t

I just finished up a 26-part series of confessions.  The order was jumbled, but they were all taken from my phonebook, letter by letter, and aimed at individual persons.  You can see the –finally– complete navigation here:

Navigationpt. i, pt. ii, pt. iii, pt. iv, pt. v, pt. vi, pt. vii, pt. viii, pt. ix, pt. x, pt. xi, pt. xii, pt. xiii, pt. xiv, pt. xv, pt. xvi, pt. xvii, pt. xviii, pt. xix, pt. xx, pt. xxi, pt. xxii, pt. xxiii, pt. xxiv, pt. xxv, pt. xxvi

Anyway.  I learned a lot of things about myself in this process and I wanted to share some of them with you.  In bullet form, because we’ve all grown so used to it.

  • I’m sort of a dick.
  • My phonebook needs some serious reorganization.  Some names are kept in my phonebook long after they are no longer useful.  For instance: the entry “*Munk tru” which is found in confession list pt. vi is that of a friend of a friend who hired me and subsequently became a semi-regular blog-reader.  I do not think she has thought about me in months and I sincerely doubt if I will ever see her again.  But she’s still in my phone book and will stay there.  Since there are so many people in my list that I will probably never again see, there are an inordinate number of entries in which I say “I’m okay with never seeing you again.”  Or something of the sort.  This would be a very callous thing to say if they were people in my immediate social circle, but as they are people from the far past, I think I’m okay with it.
  • There are a lot of women that sort of like me or I sort of like.
  • … a lot.  This came as a bit of a shocker, but it really shouldn’t be.  I was single and looking for a long time.  It’s just bothersome
  • A lot of the people in my life are far away.  I don’t get to see many of the people I care about very often.  But those are just the numbers that derive from moving often in my life.  Luckily, I get to see some pretty awesome people most days.
  • …  but they’re a very small subsection of my phone list, apparently.
  • … Or maybe I just don’t have very many things to say to them that I can’t.  My confession about my friend *re, for instance, was “You are one of my favorite people of all time.  I love you, man.”  Not as dramatic as some of the other things I said, I know.  But… what can you do?
  • I don’t like a good percentage of the people I encounter whose phone numbers I have.  In my defense, I don’t really hang out with very many people I dislike, I just don’t delete phone numbers, so the people I dislike start accumulating on my list.
  • So maybe I’m not such a dick.
  • I hope.

What have you concluded?

I just finished up a 26-part series of confessions.  The order was jumbled, but they were all taken from my phonebook, letter by letter, and aimed at individual persons.  You can see the –finally– complete navigation here: Navigation:  pt. i, pt. ii, pt. iii, pt. iv, pt. v, pt. vi, pt. vii, pt. viii, pt.…