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A Pixelated Mind

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Why the Brontë sisters carried a rape whistle

I was recently asked, in a culturally infectious transmission of information (a meme), which literary characters I’d make out with if I could. Since hot female leads are usually not the reason I choose books, this list was tough, but I got through it, so here goes:

  1. Lenore from The Raven. Hey, I know she at least drove someone crazy.
  2. Nancy Drew. I’d help her solve the mystery of where I’ve been her entire life.
  3. Hermione Granger of Harry Potter fame. Hey! In this last book she was finally old enough!
  4. Dulcinea del Toboso from Don Quixote de la Mancha. She sounds sweet. No pun intended. Oh, wait– yeah: it was.
  5. Chistine Daae of Phantom of the Opera. Ya dig?
  6. Grendel’s Mother from Beowulf. Because she seems interesting.
  7. Daisy Buchannan from The Great Gatsby. Because she doesn’t.
  8. Mary of Nazareth of Bible. I know she wouldn’t go all the way, but do you think she would at least go to third base?
  9. Helen of The Iliad. Her face launched a thousand ships. I wonder if she was a good kisser at least.
  10. Penelope of the Odyssey. Just to imagine the conversation later.
    Odysseus: So you really waited 20 years for me?
    Penelope: Well…… there was this one guy…

Conclusion: I have no idea why the Brontë sisters carried a rape whistle.

p.s. Ramadan is over now. Thank Allah! 🙂

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I was recently asked, in a culturally infectious transmission of information (a meme), which literary characters I’d make out with if I could. Since hot female leads are usually not the reason I choose books, this list was tough, but I got through it, so here goes: Lenore from The Raven. Hey, I know she…

3 Comments

  1. I want to paint a picture for you: I was eating a turkey and ham sandwich with vermont cheddar on whole wheat. I check your website and start reading this meme post. I take a bite out my delicious sandwich, followed immediately with a swig of my Coca-Cola Classic. I then read number 8. I spit out soda and sandwich on my LCD. My wife walks into the office and asks, “What happened?” I say, “Just reading ’bout some guy who wants to give Mary of Nazareth some deep dickin’, but would settle with a loose handjob.” She shakes her head and walks out. Nice job!

  2. Ah, yes. Giving it good to the mother of Christ. That’s terrible and freaking hilarious all at one time.

    Love the small print, BTW.

    Thanks for playing along!