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A Pixelated Mind

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June 27, 2007

I need to rethink my naming of these daily posts. Frankly, I’m not seriously discussing June, the 27th OR 2007.

But can you imagine if I did? Wouldn’t it be awesome?

*scene: the Internet, you are reading another well-crafted blog post about something you couldn’t care less about when all of a sudden, you break the fourth wall… let’s watch!*

Pixel: … and no other month begins on the same day of the week as June within the same calendar year. As most people know, June was named after the lesser known younger brother of Julius and Augustus Caesar: Junius Naturalbirth.

You: What the hell? No it’s not, it’s named after Juno, the wife and sister of Jupiter in Roman Mythology!

Pixel: Huh? Oh, that’s a competing theory, but I think history will eventually prove me right on this one. I mean, Hera wasn’t–

You: –Juno–

Pixel: — Juno wasn’t even an important god! I mean, why would they name March after Mars, June after Juno and then no other month after any deities of note? Where the hell is my Venusrary and my Jupiterember?

You: That’s besides the point, there was no such person as “Junius Naturalbirth!”

Pixel: I’d like to see you prove that negative!

You: Julius and Augustus weren’t even related! Augustus took that name as an honorific!

Pixel: That’s a competing theory, but if he really took it as an honorific, why didn’t he call himself Dr. Awesomo McFantastico like I’m going to do now?

You: ???

Dr. Awesomo McFantastico: Point, set and match. Moving on… June 27 is the 178th day of the year, which means I only have 187 days left to hug 48 people. It is National HIV Testing Day in United States and Veterans’ Day in the United Kingdom. June 27th is widely accepted to have never been the birthday of anyone of note. By the way, happy birthday.

You: Today’s not my birthday.

Dr. Awesomo McFantastico: Really? Are you sure? It’s not coming up soon, is it?

You: Not for another 364 days.

Dr. Awesomo McFantastico: *Phew!* I thought I’d missed it. Moving on…

*scene fades to black*

…

Dr. Awesomo McFantastico: What the hell? Why did everything go black?

p.s. Today will be the last time the title for a daily slice will be the actual day. From now on, I’ll start titling them after events of note that happened on that particular day.

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I need to rethink my naming of these daily posts. Frankly, I’m not seriously discussing June, the 27th OR 2007. But can you imagine if I did? Wouldn’t it be awesome? *scene: the Internet, you are reading another well-crafted blog post about something you couldn’t care less about when all of a sudden, you break…