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Phrases that could end political careers

40.  No matter where I go, I always have to carry something with me, usually in the form of a binder, book, or backpack.  When I was a kid, I used to carry two books everywhere: in case i was ever trapped anywhere and finished one.  That never happened.  Now I carry three: just in case I don’t feel like reading two of them.

The post for today has been delayed because I needs to get this idea out and Sunday is a bad blog audience day.  So, instead of my analysis of my own sense of humor, I’ll give an example in the form of phrases that would end a political career.

  • “Actually, I think Martin Luther King Jr. was just asking to be shot.”
  • “You know, I’ve got to say, I just don’t trust the Jews.”
  • “Are you kidding?  I convert my dollars to yen every paycheck.”
  • “You think that’s bad?  MY preacher regularly wipes his butt with the American flag.”
  • “Bitches ain’t shit.”
  • “Man, even I’M voting for the other guy.”
  • “You wouldn’t believe the kind of tail I get in this office.”
  • “Don’t worry: I’m just saying this stuff to placate my base.”
  • “I voted for that because it was really politically prudent at the time.  But I never really believed that.”
  • “Why am I only running for four years?  Because with what I’m going to do, nobody would elect me after that anyway.”
  • “Hey, if the economy ever gets that bad, we can just sell Alaska back to Russia.”
  • “It doesn’t really matter who you vote for, we decided I would win way back in January.”

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40.  No matter where I go, I always have to carry something with me, usually in the form of a binder, book, or backpack.  When I was a kid, I used to carry two books everywhere: in case i was ever trapped anywhere and finished one.  That never happened.  Now I carry three: just in…