Author Archives: Gabe the Beaver

Academic Advice Column

Dear Gabe, Many months ago, my adviser recommended I add a particular faculty member to my committee: call him Dr. X. I had misgivings about adding Dr. X because I’ve never known him to have any students and I’d heard … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: Probably some stupid title again

Hello and welcome new denizens to another classic column by your very own Gabriel O’Beaver Leibowitz. As you are well aware, next week shall be New Mexico College of Agriculture and Mechanic Arts’ March week off from school (Go NM … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: Obituary

Gabe the Notorious Beaver, 18, passed away Sunday from congenital heart failure and dehydration caused by chronic, explosive diarrhea. He was 21. Beaver, widely recognized for his record-worthy control of his flatulence and butt-gustingly hilarious columns in local and international … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: On Canadian Memories

Gabe the Magnanimous Beaver here to reminisce about my youth, so shut up, stupid! See, I was raised in French Canadia— don’t let this fool you, it’s just a reference to the type of kissing we do— and in Canada, … Continue reading

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Tao of Gabe: On Mass Guys

Tao of Gabe Gabe the Light-hearted Beaver here continuing his analysis of what happens when the human genders, XY and Roman numeral twenty, are forced into confined spaces for large periods of time. As you’ll recall, last week I gave … Continue reading

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