Goodie Grab Bag V

Oh, what the hell? Might as well go for gold. The following is made up on the spot (or as close to the spot as I can get) so as to not lose face to Seth, who threatens to steal my gimmick and be better at it than me.

1: So, do you like… stuff?
2: No, stuff shot my paw.

You can’t beat me at this, I’ve been doing this since I was suckling at your mom’s teat!

3: So there I was, on Dream Date and I had a choice between Quasimodo, the Elephant Man, and Pixel Q. Styx!
4: Oh, my gosh! That’s terrible! So where’s he taking you?
3: Oh, the an isolated moor, his mom’s house for dinner, the bell tower…

I wish I could take back my own birth, and yours, and several dozen other people’s. Oh, wait, I can! It’s called death!

2: Ask me if I have any relatives in New Orleans.
1: Do you have any relatives in New Orleans?
2: Not Anymore, you insensitive bastard!

You don’t know Bruce Lee? You know, from the Green Hornet? Enter the Dragon? Way of the Dragon? Kiss of the Kitty?

1: You don’t look like the picture in your wallet.
2: I shouldn’t. He and I don’t get along.

It’s not that I don’t like him, it’s just that he represents everything I detest in humanity and should be annihilated like the vermin he is.

1: You dance it, Pixel! Hang out with your wang out!
2: Yeah, thanks…
1: Rock out with your cock out!
2: But then wouldn’t I stick out?

If the Bible was a mathematical number, it’d be pi, because it’s irrational.

3 Comments

  1. Ha ha. Be my guest. I jibe at Seth because I like the kid, but I wouldn’t mind being the originator of the concept
    (really, I only meant it for the one or two times that I was away from the internet for a while and had multiple ideas for posts at once).

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