I’ve grown used to the check engine light.

I’ve grown used to the check engine light. It comforts me. It’s like my car has a broken heart. It’ll be okay, little guy.

I don’t like tennis, but I do like sports.
If I’d have known today was going to be such a shit fest, I would not have worn white pants.
I know I said I knew every song by Cake, but that was a lie.
Soggy biscuit is the kind of game in which you can come in first and yet still not win.

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