Your phishing name is the color of your first car, your mother’s maiden name, your childhood nickname, and your childhood pet.

Mine is Red Rover Red Rover.

Why doesn’t the Suicide Hotline advertise that its phone number is 1-800-APE-TALK?
Jack disease: Jack ages at 4x the normal rate.
1: I signed up for an improv class, but missed half the classes.
My Twitter account is old enough to steal alcohol now! https://t.