I like referencing past jobs and hobbies because nobody can verify them.

I like referencing past jobs and hobbies because nobody can verify them. “I used to be a traffic cop/junkie/kangaroo.”

If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard a compliment about my booty.
Are there gorillas in the monsterverse? People seem to not know that Kong is just a big gorilla.
Why does all emotional baggage have to be about relationships and not, like, fear of muppets or something?
Canadians have a dozen ways to say “snow,” no ways to say “no”

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