Pro-tip: If you slow down @benshapiro by 50 percent, he sounds less like a cross between a thirsty auctioneer and a cocky payday lender.
2: You’ve never read Harry Potter? What are you, illiterate? 1: Hey! 2: I’m sorry, I genuinely didn’t think you’d know what that meant.
I like a lot of dairy in my coffee. I’ll have a half Half & Half.
1: you’re very handsome. 2: no, you must just have terrible vision. … I’m bad at accepting compliments…
I missed new year’s and birthday posts the past few years. They’ve been great years by any objective metric, but the subjective experience has been mostly stress and ennui. I’ve been on a bit of a tour of old friends…
I’m like a fish: I’m bad at analogies.
Y’allTube is the plural of YouTube.
Teaching, derailed by student: T: suppose you had eight arms. S: how did I get them? T: at the arm store. By which I mean the morgue.
In some gangs, people tattoo their last names across their backs. So they know who’s who while playing shirts vs. skins.
All generations, sans the Silents have trended toward Democrats. Silent but deadly.