I’m glad I have friends that prevent me from being irrational sometimes. But where were you all on Pi Day??

I just don’t get this explanation of humor.

That TV show on design is so gawdy.

This article on creativity is the same old thing.

This book on writing has too many typos.

I have successfully cooked pasta! Kids: Tonight we eat like kings.

My response to the census is required by law? My warning letter said no such thing! I feel unprepared.

I like going to the gym and asking bodybuilders if they mind if I change the channel from ESPN to Dora the Explorer.

Is too little too soon worse than too much too late? You’ll have to ask your mom. (OH!!)

I prefer to think of it as driving while texting.

What was Neurath’s boat transporting? Boat parts?

I keep getting stuck at square one. Time to go back to square zero.

I was worried whether Daylight Savings Time affected Pi Moment until I realized this is the most contrived holiday ever.

My heart didn’t just skip a beat: it dropped out altogether!

I don’t have any shark friends. I’m afraid of getting too chummy with them.

The census sent a letter saying they would send another letter. I’m bothered they didn’t sent an earlier letter saying to expect That one.

“You’re like MacGuyver! Only you’re a girl. So MacGirlver!”