How much do I get for two wisdom teeth?
I don’t know if I ever really believed in the Tooth Fairy. I know I would get cold hard cash (about $1.12… adjusting for inflation) for every tooth I lost. And I’m pretty sure I didn’t think it was really…
I don’t know if I ever really believed in the Tooth Fairy. I know I would get cold hard cash (about $1.12… adjusting for inflation) for every tooth I lost. And I’m pretty sure I didn’t think it was really…
400 Bills. Wow, I feel like there should be a punchline to that. Or maybe the first half of a joke. Something, anyway. This was a thought experiment proposed by Drew. I was going to comment, but poot. I figured…
Going to the Vans Warped Tour: +5 scene points Buying ticket ahead of time: -1 scene point Getting there on time to late: +1 scene point Running like a pansy to the arena: -2 scene points Running into friends at…
This nation has an unnatural underdog fixation. Everywhere and everyone is being ‘persecuted’ for something. I think it borders on paranoia, quite frankly. I mean, surely Some group is at the top? Religion, scientists, republicans, democrats, environmentalists, short-sighted ignorami, business,…
To show just how terrible Reagan was, I’m going to make a list of the top 10 presidents. In order. Here we go: Franklin Delano Roosevelt (Dem.) George Washington (Ind.) Abraham Lincoln (Rep.) Lyndon Baines Johnson (Dem.) James Madison (Dem-Rep.)…
My number one choice for the Greatest Americans ever, patterned on the Discovery Channel list. Their top pick was Ronald Reagan (seriously!). Ha ha. Americans are kooky-ass bastards.My top three list would include Jefferson and Washington (props to those who…
On Rock & Roll: “Madonna Dahmer?! Are you nuts? He’s Totally Twisted, Jason! That concert is no place for any Christian to be!” On Pornography: “1: Has your dad really been in jail? 2: Just overnight… He got picked up…
My top 5 list of the Greatest Americans ever, patterned on the Discovery Channel list. Their top five only sucked in that it had Ronald Reagan earning a spot (WTF??). Here’s my list: Benjamin Franklin Thomas Jefferson* Abraham Lincoln Franklin…
Pfft. Humans. I hope the oil crash kills all the people that weren’t done in by Mad Cow, cell phone radiation, pollution, the government, and AIDS. Is that wrong of me? I mean, I’ve been driving a hybrid car since…
For years, all of my friends have gone to the Vans Warped Tour every year. I never have. I never felt like it. This year I do. But since the Warped Tour is so large and I might only get…