The weather channel says it’s raining right now, but my window disagrees.

The year of a creative challenge every week was too much of a time commitment for me. New Year Resolution fail.

My favorite phrases today: “Heroic nudity” and “reluctant sexual partner.”

In movies, you sometimes see happy revelations that turn horrible things into good things all along. In life it’s usually the reverse.

My calendar has an alarm for my birthday every year. Repeat: Annually on May 29. Start: May 29, 1985. End: May 29, 2016.

My calendar reminds me of my birthday every year. I’m thankful for this: it gives me time to get myself something nice.

I want to start a journal called “the Scientific Community” so that when we accept submissions, it fucks with journalists.

If I worked for Nature, I’d try to be witty in my correspondence: “Your paper, unfortunately, is not fit for Nature.”

Getting rejected from Science magazine must suck. “We’re sorry, your paper was not appropriate for Science.”

So Google Buzz and Google Wave suck, but why don’t more people mock Google Phonebook? Or… any online phone book, really.

I have now been vaccinated against the flu. Also, my math abilities have skyrocketed and social skills plummeted.

I was told the soporific in NyQuil was alcohol. That doesn’t seem fun.

Watching (500) Days of Summer on repeat. Nice. Different. Heart-wrenching.

Got chills and coughing up the consumption. I feel like death only with less fashion sense.

I need to keep me away from myself. That guy is such a loser.

We’re going on a road trip. Across the world! Except we’re only going to one place. And we’re flying there. And you pay

“I just need a chick to get over that hump.” -Daniel

For my next party, I’m going to stock up on non-alcoholic drinks. Just to fuck with people.

Logged back into Myspace today. In other news, I’m going to take a shower now.

I am wondering… what percentage of people use Twitter the way the welcome video suggests you should? That is what I am doing right now.

Don’t mind her, it’ll be her time of the month in a few weeks.

I can’t remember the last time I had that much alcohol… No really.

I hate Valentine’s Day episodes. They just make me feel inadequate and unloved. Yes, that even happens with Liz Lemon getting a root canal.

I feel the need to apologize for how unwitty I’ve been, but I only like to post witty things and I can’t think of a witty way to say it.

You can’t buy alcohol until 12:05 Sundays? How do people make it through church then?

My shopping list is… Everything.

Note: don’t download the latest iphone firmware. *Ahem* Can someone send that note back in time to my past self? You can just call him, too. He still has a working phone.

I get Twitter, but I just don’t understand Facebook status updates. I mean, who cares what you had for breakfast?

What is it that positive charges have that makes them so much more upbeat than negative charges?

Grades suck. If I had to grade grades, I’d give grades a frowny face and a giraffe.

If I were Shawn Spencer from Psych, absolutely random and irrelevant things would be highlighted.

I would have shaved if I had remembered that I was going to draw myself all day today.

Creative Challenge: Tomorrow is hourly comic day () Draw a comic every hour you’re awake.

I really liked the cinematography of Romeo + Juliet, but I found the story really lame.

At least with the Black Eyed Peas I never feel stupid that I don’t know the lyrics.

J.D. Salinger died! And I had an exclusive interview with him next week, too!

We completed the humor cycle: first iPad jokes were the rage, now the trend is to mock them. I hope metamocking is next.

I can’t wait to get an #iPad so I can update my Blag.

Creative Challenge 4: (Photography) Make a thematic photographic essay of 5 pictures. To be repeated at the end of the year.