Why does it hurt more now when I get accepted into a grad program than when I get rejected? I should just tell them all to reject me.
4. I was born at 19:41, on 29 May 1985. There’s nothing really special about this day, but I still pause every time I see the clock say 5:29. I have a friend who’s birthday it is today. I feel…
3. If I get good practice, I can solve a standard Rubik’s cube in under 90 seconds. This meme is directed entirely at Ashley. She knows why. These are all official IMDB “Plot Keywords” to movies I like. I am…
“Hey, lady, how can I be sure your child isn’t an ADULT molester?”
In Alaska. ¡Oh, mi dios!
2. My grandfather was a bracero. I never think about this, but it’s true. Craziness. Reasons why I’m not in marketing: He didn’t believe in Antler Ninjas: Ninjas with antlers for hands… He was DEAD Wrong. A family comedy you’ll…
1. I hate cheese. I don’t know why, but the texture and smell has always grossed me out. One exception: pizza. And no, I don’t know why it’s okay with bread and tomato sauce, it just is. From now onto…
A bit after I wrote yesterday’s post, someone else from the past called me. We spoke for 153 minutes,1 which was awesome, because I hadn’t spoken to her in months. She was one of the two girls Gordon and I…
A quick note before you read this post. Everything here is completely true (with the mild exception that Frank’s real name is Daniel Davenport and my real name is Juan Reshawn Stolzalski, as previously discussed). I did not alter the…
Gordon called me once, a few years after he’d left New Mexico. He said he was in the area and that we should hang out. I agreed, but neither of us took the initiative and nothing ever came of it.…
As promised, our story begins when Gordon and I are friends and we spend much of freshman year together… but first, a word about my first girlfriend.1 Over the summer, I developed a crush on a girl, Crystle, and asked…
Reminiscing, doubting, dreaming, hoping, yawning, and poking. All in a moment’s silent contemplation by yours truly.
Sordon Gpurgeon was an interesting kid. I have vague recollections of him from as early as sixth grade, and am reasonably sure he was in one of my seventh grade classes, but I always knew who he was nonetheless. Gordon…
A long time ago, back when I cried every time someone shattered a beer bottle on my bottom lip, some angry white people came to my house. It was an old redneck and some blond, white kids that were about…
I’m trying to think of something offensive and yet funny, but I can’t seem to get them to mix in the exact formula that has made my blog so famous:1 Ingredients: One part taboo One part unexpected A dash of…
I want to write a sequel to Anne Frank’s The Diary of a Young Girl, but from the German Nazi point of view.
Life is too short to listen to anything but the White Stripes
Why does the Wikipedia article for Anne Frank not have any ‘Criticisms’ section?