Academic Advice Column
Dear Gabe, Many months ago, my adviser recommended I add a particular faculty member to my committee: call him Dr. X. I had misgivings about adding Dr. X because I’ve never known him to have any students and I’d heard…
My roommates are the worst!
“I’ve decided that the best way to live my life is to treat myself with the same basic decency with which I would treat complete strangers.” – Mari A-H My roommates are these two guys: Future Me and Past Me.…
PODCAST!
The more astute among you may have noticed that there is a new tab in the top section of my page: “ID.” What is ID, you ask? It’s short for Internal Dialogues: my new weekly Podcast! My friend Daniel and…
Things I am bad at estimating
How much time things will take How much time I have available How funny I am How much something will affect me emotionally How tall I am How pregnant ladies are How much hugging is appropriate How people will take…
Time Travel: A Mini-Comic
Nonsense and Reference
Shockingly obvious realization: You can have a joke that doesn’t refer to any cultural aspect and you can have a reference that isn’t funny. Background: I went to a boardgame night a few weeks ago with some friends of a…
Pixel’s Central Axiom of Dating
This applies to people 25 and older: The man you meet with whom you feel have a connection is more likely to be a jerk who knows how to manipulate women than a soul mate. Corollary: A guy who makes…
Super Friend Bash 2011
IT’S A LOCK: WE’RE GOING TO THE KEYS!! Super Friend Bash is happening again this year. Mark your calendars and tell your friends to mark theirs because we’re going TROPICAL! From August 19th until August 27th, some of my closest…
My New Comic!
It’s part of my comic class. The assignment was “Animals.” It’s based on this tweet.
Why I hate the Onion
It’s simple: It is a parody that takes itself too seriously. Sure, the headlines are funny sometimes, but then you start reading the story and you realize that it juuust keeeps goooing. The reason it does this is because the…
Things Past Me was better at
Past versions of myself have been much better than me at quite a number of things. Some of these I want to get back to, others I’m ambivalent about. Here’s a nice list: Having a sense of purpose – and…
New Themes
I’ve decided that from now on I will live a satirical life in the following ways: I will fear Canadian immigrants because they are stealing our jobs. I will fight for a cure for Gum Disease. I will regard left-handed…
A Daily Checklist
(Crossposted) This is a list of items I hope to do every day. If I fail at any particular item, it’s okay, because there are many items on this list and I just want to do most of them: Run…
2011
Here we go! Let’s get it DONE this year. No particular new projects to work on. Get down to 172 lbs. or 12% body fat Start and maintain a podcast Maintain my Sarah Project Maintain my secret Sentence Project Pass…
2010 Redux
Did I accomplish all of my goals for this year? Did I accomplish any? This past year I stopped making 18 resolutions because I kept forgetting them and had less than a .500 batting average. I went down to seven…
2010 Off Paper
Every year since 2005, I’ve posted sporatic memories here at the end of the year. The last few posts of a year and the first few posts of the next tend to be very mecentric and likely difficult for most…
Friend, I hardly know thee
Here’s a fun game: pick a friend you know really well then spend an entire evening pretending to be shocked by their normal behaviors as if you didn’t really know them at all. Example using my friend Bre: “Wait, you’re…
Worst Humanities Movie Plot
Humanities are also usually done terribly in movies. This is a synopsis of the movie with the worst humanities ever: Jersey Jones is a sexy professor of comparative literature at a major private university. He teaches a 0/1 load.1 His…