Wait. Isn’t New Mexico supposed to be warm? What is it with this weather?? Gosh. Temperature tonight: Shiver with a 50% chance of brr. (5 to 15 C and 41 to 60 F, by the way. Well, it’s colder than…

Best Overall Post (I Give Up)^3 Funniest Post Let’s make a dead philosopher cry Oddest Post Whoo! Whoo!! Whoo!!! Most Insightful Post Accepting Vagueness Most Memorable Post I, Kid Most Original Post P42 Worst Overall Post Urrghh… Best Meme Goodie…

Okay. This internet connection officially sucks. As does this computer. I miss my lappy. ~~~ One of the worst things in the world is pulling out your little, black, Tom Riddle-type moleskin book to get the e-mail addresses of all…

Screw donating my hair to chemo-irradiated orphan children in the third world: I’m making a rope out of it!

To all the people I said I’d e-mail as soon as I got back: I’m working on it. Give me some time. This is easier than individual e-mails. Don’t worry all, I am safely in New Mexico. The plane didn’t…

Goodbye Australia, I go. I’ve loved my time here more than you’ll ever know. Goodbye New South Wales, I go. For you, I shed no tear: it’s the people to whom my tales I will always owe. Goodbye Sydney, I…

I’m going to miss these people more than anyone has any possible idea. In no particular order, I remember when… Jack Black cut in front of me in the queue as I was boarding a plane on the way here.…

This month’s carnival of “Wow, That’s Funny!” is up on Quailitude Dot Com. Next month is going to be hosted by Seth. You can submit your own quips by e-mailing them to submissions@pixcapacitor.com. Be sure to follow the rules. Remember,…

I’ve noticed that some posts don’t even trickle in the blogospherical psyche while some seem to gather comments like they’re going out of style (which they are. Comments are so last season). For a long time I assumed it was…

Tao of Gabe I’m Gabe the Fantastic Beaver and I’m in love. If you have never been in love, it is a strange feeling that I can’t really describe to you but with a series of increasingly terrible metaphors, similes,…

When I was 16, my friend decided to go on a midnight hike across a mountain. Not wanting him to die, I went with him– wearing all black– across a mountain that was 40 km across (or 22 gallons). By…

My ideal curriculum: Grade 1: Addition, Subtraction, Multiplication, simple division. English. Latin. Reading. Spelling. Art. P.E. Grade 2: Large scale addition, Subtraction with Borrowing, Multiplication, Long Division. Latin. English. Choice of Japanese or Chinese. Spelling, Grammar. Drawing. P.E. (swimming) Grade…

I’ve created a bunch of games over my lifetime. Here, in all their glory, are all the ones I could find in the archives: “People projecting their labels on you projekt:“ hold hands with a friend of yours of the…

(sorry about the shoddy html earlier. I accidentally went off with a beautiful woman, had an adventure, saved a pestilent bird only to let him die again, had a fantastic time with friends I love, had good food, played some…

Gabe the Enlightened Beaver here to boost your low, low self-esteem. It has come to my attention that many uglier, dumber, and smellier humans have a low opinion of themselves. We all have moments in which we feel worthless, though…

Who here hasn’t laughed at someone who had a xanga? And while livejournal is a bit better, it’s still a blogospherical embarrassment. There was once a time when we at Blogger were at the top and could brag about it,…

Only the mediocre die middle aged. 1: So you had to swallow your words? 2: Yeah. 1: Then what? 2: I had a vowel movement. You know what’s funny? Humorous observations. 1: Women, Nature’s Rubik’s Cube. 2: Yeah, but I…

The deadline for the next WTF! Carnival is the 25th (Friday). Send your submissions to submissions(at)pixcapacitor(dot)com and I shall forward them to Aeger. Alternatively, you could send them to Aeger and he’ll post them the 31st. (it has come to…