What is the Pix Capacitor? The Pix Capacitor is a viewspaper where all sorts of craziness takes place. Socrates, Sigmund Freud, and Albus Dumbledore run rampant through the pages, and a beaver named Gabe gives advice to people who have…
Oh, dear! I just found out that someone likes someone else, but only when that other person wears cornrows in his (or her) hair. Not only that, but I found out that someone really likes to sodomize other people’s stuffed…
I really like this section. I’m not sure why: Eli: I need to do something. Jonathan: Like work out? Frank: Yeah, you seem stressed. Eli: I am. Frank: Have you been masturbating? Eli: No! Frank: Start masturbating. But, like all…
Gosh, this person is sooo boring!! Just look at all he or she is writing! WHO CARES?? *sigh* What some people will waste bandwidth on.. And now, a .wav file of Tickle Me Elmo’s famous speech, played backwards!!
I laughed at this one for nigh on two minutes: “Hey, you’ve got a banana in your ear!” “What?” “I said, YOU’VE GOT A BANANA IN YOUR EAR!” “What? I can’t hear you; I’ve got a banana in my ear!”
Happy Birthday Jason D. Happy Belated B-Day Margret C. But, because you’re happy, neither of you get your own post. Screw you both.
I wonder. what’s the most amound of close friends one can have at once? I mean people who, if you didn’t see each other for a week, you’d both feel a bit off? Same thing for regular friends. People who…
It’s official. My pocket PC is dead. It had made it so long, too.. If only I’d cared for it more.. if only it were compatible with my laptop.. if only, if only.. Let’s have a moment of silence for…
… you never expect someone who sniffs your underwear to scream about how you never shut up about yourself. I bored my stalker by talking about myself too much. p.s. I am officially bored. Usually i’m just ‘wanting to do…
…whenever I’m in New York city to not sleep with any gay 40-year old males. Also, it’s raining. Here. In New Mexico. And it has been for a few days now. I bet you don’t get crazy stuff like water…
Dear world, I mean this in the nicest way, but we have problems. I reckon they’re irreconcilable. Yup. You guessed it. It’s a four letter-word: girl… (s). *sigh* I’m beginning to think this just isn’t worth it anymore. I’m also…
I think it just might. Let me know what you think before I start commenting all willy-nilly on myself.
Hey, you know what’s fun? Obscene and pornographic materials! They’re almost as fun as violence and discriminating based on race, sex, religion, nationality, disability, sexual orientation, or age. So let’s all do some illegal activities, while I help you gamble…
After reading George Carlo’s book (or at least seeing most of the icky pictures), you’d think that I would know better than to rest my cell phone next to my crotch… I don’t do a lot of things that people’d…
Dear Jenny Belle Werness, Thank you for being such an excellent activist. Thank you for being so cute and possibly related to the head of the American Atheists that you won their scholarship. You’re probably going to spend that money…
After years and years of waiting (about 90 days now), I have finally earned a more well-rounded profile. No longer will people be able to mock the bejeezus out of me for not having my own stats on my page.…
No real news, other than my finding Erica’s new blog and my new subscribe option… wait, that is news. This is a test of the subscribe option. I want to know if it’s fo’ real. Oh, and they canceled Life…
How are you? This letter is in response to your letter dated February 9, 2005. Dear sir –STOP– We are writing you this letter to tell you to cease your infernal –STOP– manifestations you call ‘blogs’ that are in referrence…
There is a direct and inverse squared ratio between the amount of awesome stuff one does and how many posts they put on their blog. Figure that one out.. .. Or don’t. Whatever. It works like this: Posts = [1/(Awesome…
The Blogging Bloggers Association of Blogging in the Blogosphere (or BBABB) has rated this site: P42, which means that no children under the age of 42 or whose names contain the letter ‘P’ are allowed to think about this board.…
My cousin has a nose picking disorder, and recently it has become chronic. He told me that he had a mission to find his brain. I’m concerned for his disorder, and was wondering what could aide my cousin in his…
Don’t Do What Donny Don’t Does: Donny Don’t make your posts excessively long. Donny Don’t make your posts about nothing anybody who doesn’t know about it wouldn’t care about? Got it? Because I don’t. Donny Don’t go for too long…
Crap. I never meant to delete a post… sorry about that. I hate reading that in other people’s blogs, sorry I did it here. In any case, I reposted it right afterward, so no big loss.
If you hate memes too, you should put this in your signature, profile, blog, e-mail, website, title, correspondence, and legal name. Everyone should put this in their legal name.
Why is it that when my friend Frank says, “I would do horrible things to that woman,” in reference to Angelina Jolie, it means something dirty or kinky and it’s funny, but when I try to say it in reference…
Hmm.. The old me would make a joke at his expense. The new me is too tired.
Now I understand why you hate him, Pammy. We could have left in the morning. We could have gotten there and hung out with people we knew and had a blast. We could have stayed the night there and then…
Happy Birthday, Pam!! I wish there were some way to see you on this, your 21st b-day… hmm… Wait… it seems as if I’m going on a spur of the moment, impromptu trip to Albuquerque armed with nothing more than…
I never asked to be on DailyKos’ list of blogs that are spreading the truth about social security, or on blogs now’s list of blogs discusing MSNBC or Dr. Dobson’s friggin’ crazy accusations, but I guess I am… Also, I’m…
I just saved two more people. See, I saw that the Parking Nazii was coming by from another holocaust (or something), so I just went ahead of her and put money in all of the meters that were about to…
Get online just as someone posts something, then keep changing the page until the person realizes that they’re being messed with.
Turns out I was full of bunk with one of my previous posts. I’m not going anywhere near USQ. It’s Macquarie all the way, baby. Also, check out these guys. I know the Able fellow from AP Biology in high…
I’ll give a dollar to the first person to tell me how to get rid of that pop-up that stalks this page. Better yet, I’ll give them $1024 if they tell me today. $512 if they tell me the 4th,…
Observation the third: Observation 1 needs modification. It seems that from late March to June is the mating season for the Washingtonian studentis. More observation is needed. Observations in Time: The Washingtonian studentis holds grudges like nobody’s business. Observation no.…
‘Nuff said.
Oh, and Jcak’s birthday was yesterday. Happy bir–*trails off*
Take your pick: this room, which might have its own bathroom … this one, that shares with the room next door … or this one, which shares a bathroom for every dozen people? And you’d be surprised which one is…
I hate high school students now. Not all of them, just 17%. But that’s okay, because our good pal Gabe has made a list of all the groups you are allowed to hate in today’s culture. Students are one of…
What the fizz? Obviously he was. I mean, we all saw the Passion of the Christ, right? Or at least the South Park episode about it.. oh, screw it. Speaking of which, am I the only one that severely hates…
70 posts in the month of January. That’s an average of 2.29 posts per day. And we’re not even counting the retconning of my history (although shh! You didn’t hear it from me). I seriously need a life. And now……
alright. Enough stealing Gorzo‘s posts. It’s not even fun anymore. It’s like he wants to suck. Jeez…
Wow. So it wasn’t a fluke. Apparently, another person believes I’m intriguing. It seems that there’s an entire group of people alive in Washington (Wenatchee or Entiat) who know and/or like each other. I might even go so far as…
See? Some people think I’m interesting! And not just for my viewspaper, either *grumble, grumble, grumble* Sure, they’re about 1000 miles away, but hey: I don’t see you having peeps!
Not another broken link…
Hmm… The real State of the Union, eh? Gotta admit, this was disappointing… to say the least. This one, however, is pretty friggin’ good.