People are upset over Game of Thrones spoilers. What I really want is spoilers for how November 8 will go.

We wonder why these scandals are coming out now. But we’d be saying the same thing in an #AlternateElection about solving the Zodiac letter.

The country wants a French Revolution. I’d be okay if we all just caught up with the Copernican Revolution.

2016, the year America really *got* Bill Murray’s plight in Groundhog Day.

Can we live in the #alternateelection? Literally any one would be fine

What was the big scandal this time in 2012? Flag pins maybe? Oh yeah, it was Obama skillfully handling a natural disaster. #goodoledays

Good point, Donald. Romney released his tax returns very late in the election. What a horrible messenger.

Looking for a costume at Party City. It’s so hard to find a Waldo here.

I want Donald Trump to lose big league.

Whenever this election gets me down, I think of Ted Cruz’s horrible timing and I just laaugh and laaaaugh.

The Guardian is always weirdly good at making infographics for American elections:

That’s it, 2016 scares me. I’m going to take my wife, son, and daughter and hide out in a bunker until January. It’ll be a *Nuclear* bunker.

I’m such a believer in evidence-based decision making that when the evidence came out against evidence-based decision making, I did too.

Seeing the family seated before the #debate feels like a mustached evil doer just tied these poor people to some railroad tracks. The #debate takes a turn. @HillaryClinton made @realDonaldTrump mad in the first fifteen minutes. I… can’t even. Can…

Poor @tedcruz, such bad timing. He must be doing the hokey pokey of endorsements.

I just met someone who isn’t following the election. I just looked at him like he’d told he doesn’t know how to put on pants.

I wonder if @realdonaldtrump realizes how ironic it is that he isn’t a billionaire even in absolute value.

Barack Obama was the first black president. He’ll either be followed by the first female president or the first orange president. Historic.