My streak of pooping every time I go to Taco Bell remains unbroken.

“I’m over it.” -person who’s not over it.

2020 is a building year

You’re playing D&D, I’m playing 3D&D.

Every time the lizard brain comes out, I make relationship altering decisions and they are only sometimes good. More things to bring up in therapy..

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My predicted 2020 in emojies: Jan: ??? Feb: Mar: Apr: May: Jun: Jul: Aug: Sep: Oct: Nov: Dec: Hmmm… ??? The last three weren’t far off, I guess. Nor August.

My decade in emojis: ? ?

I don’t know about y’all, but I accomplished all of my resolutions this decade: 1) chase away everybody that loved me 2) gain like 40 pounds 3) get cool socks

Froz1 Fro2en Froz3n 4zen Froze 5

Is The Rise of Skywalker just reverse Cats? I’ve never felt more comfortable leaving a movie to go to the bathroom than during Cats. Nick on a friend who missed it: “She was like those people who missed their…

Making an end of the decade playlist. There has been a lot of mediocre music this decade. What if I just played Party Rock Anthem on repeat all New Years?

(If you need me, I’ll be living in a cave for a decade because I’m pretty sure I can’t be trusted with this task.)

People I’ve hurt this decade: >0. It feels like that number should really be 0. Let’s try to make it 0 in the next decade, yeah?

Back home. Too many memories here. Too many memories, period. I’m usually against rampant gentrification, but if they’ll bulldoze Memory Lane, I’m all for it.

There’s nothing more Gen X than never having bothered to come up with a name for itself.

I used to say the worst part of having friends is being unable to live their lives for them. But maybe the worst part of being me is that people can’t live my life for me?

SSRIsyphus. That’s it, that’s the tweet.