Video Killed the Radio Star

Young Me

43.  I type in the Dvorak keyboard. I taught myself how a few months ago and haven’t looked back (or down) since. But let’s rewind: Talking killed the grunting star Writing killed the talking star Printing press killed the meticulous…

The other, other closet

Young Me

42. When I was 14, I began my own “Newsletter.” I did it because blogs didn’t exist yet, I didn’t have an Internet connection, I was underage, and I wanted to make people laugh. So I created a four-page document…

My talents are wasted here

Young Me

41. I didn’t start listening to music until I was in high school. Before that, I honestly could not have told you the difference between rock and rap, classical and metal. (Name wise, I probably could have identified them with…

Phrases that could end political careers

Young Me

40.  No matter where I go, I always have to carry something with me, usually in the form of a binder, book, or backpack.  When I was a kid, I used to carry two books everywhere: in case i was…

Phenomenology.

Phenomenology. Why does something i care so little about have such a cool name?

The one-sided battle between Trumpet Rob and Sax Dan

I can't read this!

35. I’ve been to 33 states in the U.S., 10 in Mexico, and 1 in Australia. I still haven’t visited Canada, but that’ll have to wait until Moof asks me. It occurred to me today that I always mention Trumpet…

I am in North Carolina!

I can't read this!

32. Sometimes, when I’m bored in the shower, I shave my legs. I think it’s a bit hypocritical to demand women do it, but not be willing to do it myself. Besides, body hair disgusts me. Huh, sorry about that.…

Nobody falls in love with a résumé

I can't read this!

31. I refused to keep a resume until I graduated from college.  I sort of regret that now.  I look much, much worse on paper than I do in real life. I’m not sure why people always think about attractiveness…

Bad times to answer a cell phone

I can't read this!

30.  Senior year, I tricked my parents into getting me a cell phone by pretending I didn’t want one as a “leash.”  About three days after they ‘surprised’ me with it, I lost it.  Apparently I switched it with a…

Do men have lower standards than women?

WRAABAAH BAHHA BAHH HAA

29.  I was single from January 1, 2002 until November 12, 2005.  That’s 46.35 months.  After that, I realized that I don’t know if I can trust anyone who doesn’t know what it’s like to be alone.  I think being…

had a wonderful date.

had a wonderful date. The only thing that could ruin my day is John King hosting AC360… Aww, DAMN IT!

Sheaby, Maybe

Pwned

25. I think about going back to Australia every day. Every Day. And if I have to borrow the $2k to do it, I’ll do it. And this year. Hm. My circle of friends is so dynamic, it scares me.…

I always thought Donald and Daisy looked alike…

24. I’ve been doing a lot of research into incest recently, because it’s strange to me how ingrained our aversion to incest is, and how we always attempt to justify it by saying it’s just ‘icky’ or wrong. I’m also…

Is it bad to give up on someone?

23. About two days after the Columbine Massacre, I came to school wearing a trench coat. My psychology teacher got a kick out of it and took me to the principal’s office to ‘turn me in.’ Everyone laughed. Then, a…

Are you Okay?

Birthmark, contrast added added

21. I have a birthmark on my leg that’s more of a Rorcharch test than anything. I see the ghost of Mickey Mouse. What do you see? In civilized conversation, there is no more selfish phrase in the English language…

I’ll eventually stop posting about this

Birthmark, contrast added added

20. I’m a boy! So today I received a letter detailing my award package for my first year at Duke. Apparently, it’s a $64,281 value. 1 I was on the phone with my friend Frank, discussing what to do with…

Immanetizing the Eschaton

Birthmark, contrast added added

19. I have superior powers of reasoning, oratory, mathematics, and most everything else. But don’t worry: I only use my powers for good, evil, and to show off. Like most people, I have a list of historical figures I plan…

F’ing with SEO

18. I once memorized pi to 1000 places. Actually, that’s not true, I memorized 20 places, then started making up numbers. Surprisingly, nobody called me on it. In the hopes of writing a slightly different post that the last one…